For year twenty seven.
I wish I could describe what it's like to turn twenty-seven, but honestly, I can't. Or maybe I just don't want to, lol. Okay, it feels like even though i have just hit the beginning of my late twenties which is young still, i also know it's all about to get real. Life that is. But I’m ready! Right?
I'd planned to be further off in life at this young growing age. I planned to have the career with a degree in sociology, a family of three and a home that is a pure reflection of who i am. That was the plan. Nowhere am i near that plan, but i am not mad at the path i chose to take either. I will never have regret. The direction in which i chose to take even though there were and still is bumps in the road, i have taken heed and gained incredible knowledge that can only take me further on my life's journey.
Do i even suppose to have it all together anyways at twenty seven? I mean lets be real. It's completely unrealistic to be in your twenties with your whole life planned out already before you've had the opportunity to live, grow and learn to know who you are and what you truly desire. Though is it our faults to want to have it all figured out? It's what we have been conditioned to. You know, to have that "American Dream" working tirelessly until we're worn out by chasing after a career or family life at a certain age and time or else we're "no one" with zero talent and lonely. I get the desire for "comfortability", but the pressure and the tension that comes with it is exhausting in this day and age. Yet that is what we're doing. Making it happen as a young adult who still has so much to learn and see out in this world and within ourselves.
I took years off to discover my identity and develop skills to determine precisely what I want to pursue in life, guarantee my happiness of course. And although i may not use many of those skills i have learned in the career path i choose to settle in, i still applaud myself for choosing to take on a direction in which i have only become wiser and more knowledgeable than most at my age. I had to find myself. Growing up we are under the authority of guardians with no control over our lives. Many of us are living not for ourselves but those who've given us life and we wonder why there are high percentage rates when it comes to depression, anxiety and even suicide. The struggle with mental health is real in my generation and mostly because we are not living in our truth but to please and make others happy and comfortable. There must be a change. I suppose it starts with me. With us. I am someone living in their truth now, because i know what it feels like to put my desires on hold to accommodate others and ensure their lifestyle is supported.
Nevertheless, I have grew to be okay with where i am and accept that my paths and others are not suppose to look alike. I've come to terms with God setting me aside to not follow the crowd but to stand on my own and march in my own parade. That is, the one who can march alone will be the one most recognizable.
I have high hopes this year my ambition will consume my time the most. My drive has begun to spark back into flames and my creativity down to my love for writing is no longer blocked. And although I’m still moving forward slowly, you know, not wanting to rush into everything I want to achieve, I am still moving. God is guiding me. I am taking in all of the glory each second brings. Consuming the joy within my not so good days and also the days I am most productive and healthy.
Life wasn’t said to be easy but life definitely wasn’t meant to not enjoy. Therefore from my wakening when sun peaks to the midnight hour when the moon glow I shall never sweat what I do not have nor where I am in life. God has been good to me and as long as I remember that, as long as I keep that within my vision I know I can and will achieve regardless of what steps within my way. And my path may seem dull to others. It may seems I’ve made plenty mistakes along the way and that I’ll be stuck, stagnant in place for the long haul because I am not with what they have in possession. We’re all on a different wave than one another though. And oh yes, I’ve made mistakes definitely and we all have been through stagnation several times through life thus far but my path taken since it begun doesn’t define me instead my path has been preparing me. Getting me ready for the day I come to reap what I’ve sown. I’m ready for that. Yet until then I will enjoy and make best with my choices, my possessions, where I stand and find beauty in it. I will love myself a little more each day because I know that my time will come for greater. For now, this is as great as it gets. To be alive. To be in my right mind and being able to do Gods will. To be able to stand up straight every day and go after the unknown. I am great where I am, right now, too.
So, now at twenty seven i look back over my years and realize that the good I've done, even the bad i chose to participate in all brought me here to this moment, this year and this new mature age. And there have been many times when i have wanted to throw in the towel. Times in which i saw no way out of my pain and suffering, my trauma and lack of faith, yet here i am able to speak on a age once unpromised.
So cheers to us, whom are twenty seven this year. Be proud of how far you’ve come. It’s okay to not have the career you thought you’ll have, the big ol ranch style home on acres of land or the many small children you’ve planned to birth with the husband/wife you thought would’ve been your high school sweetheart. It is okay. You’re right where you belong, because you know why? God simply makes no mistakes. Let your light shine through and whom is within your sight right now. Leave the rest up to the Lord and trust in his way.
Twenty seven… be good to me.
This is the year of restoration and a celebration will be had.
Blessings.
k.
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