Today i realized i am living through my prayers.
Do you ever just stop in the middle of what you are doing and notice that where you are and what you have is exactly what you prayed for? Well that happened to me today. I was in the middle of writing yet having writers block and had to take a step back because i was becoming upset with self. I begun talking to a wise friend of mines who allowed me to vent my feelings and that's when it hit me that God heard my cry all along.
There were many moments in which i begun losing hope and walking away from my dreams leaving my faith behind because i just couldn't catch a break with the mishaps revolving around me. The chain wasn't breaking and chaos only seemed to grow fonder. I became baffled with God because praying was the only thing steady in my life yet there just wasn't any movement or so i thought. Patience is what i needed to have.
So today doing the conversation i began reminiscing while looking around me, feeling a little bittersweet for the reason that I'm within an environment i prayed to be in. Solitude that is. Away from noise, trouble and all of the known. Not coming to the conclusion that this was all God's work. The whole time God was indeed hearing me the days i were bent over in tears, breaking down with no hope for the future. I mean it was a moment i wish to go back in just to feel that feeling all over again. And within that moment, with my friend speaking much encouragement in to me i felt the presence of the Lord. Surrender is what took place
See, i use to try with everything in me to have control over the things i knew i didn't have the power to rule in my favor. And at the time i had no clue i was pushing God away, blocking his helping hand all because i knew where i needed to be and what needed to be done and i had in mind that my plan was the best one on the table. I fooled myself. What was happening in my life, the storm i was in was not to be rushed. My storm was made for me to feel each droplet and ripple that is of course the lesson and my God was only trying to strengthen me among the waters before he caused them to recede.
Therefore I know now God responds when we least expect. He listens and takes actions on his time not ours. I stand on his account. God is continuously moving mountains in my life that I cannot see and that is why I, we shall walk by faith and not my sight. The lord is the way maker and the deliverer. I am grateful.
I am living through my prayers. Prayers once prayed time ago. Amazed at how God has shifted me into another season ready to blossom once more. I give all my praise to my Lord for keeping me even when I wanted to let go and walk no more on my life journey. Faith and my belief in my Lord and savior saved every once of me, I am blessed.
Pray.
Reverend James Cleveland once said “when the night gets the darkest, that’s when God steps in." If you can just keep that in mind with your mind stayed on The Lord... everything will be alright.
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